Are you part of a community? What does it feel like? Look like? How does it function? There is so much we could dig into on this topic, but right now I want to skim across the surface with you so that you can understand this basic truth:
God designed you for community. It is good.
In the old testament, we read in Ecclesiastes 4, “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”
And the new testament is littered with emphasis and encouragement about living in community. Carry each other’s burdens…..one person sharpens another…one body, each member belongs to all the others… God Himself exists in the community of the Trinity! It was never good for man to be alone.
And yet in a world that has become so interconnected, so many people feel alone. Isolated. Rejected. Overlooked. Where are their people?
Jennie Allen, in her new book ‘Find Your People’, describes our current situation by saying, “We’ve replaced intrusive, real conversations with small talk, and we’ve substituted soul-baring, deep, connected living with texts and a night out together every once in a while, because the superficial stuff seems more manageable and less risky. But let’s face it: whether we live lonely or deeply connected, life is messy. The magic of the best of relationships is the mess, the sitting-together-on-the-floors-of-bathrooms, hugging-and-sobbing mess.”
And that doesn’t give us license to sit and complain about how no one is reaching out to us, that no one is calling us to hang out or ask how we’re doing. Let’s break out of our complacency and the easy, sneaky sin of laziness and go after them. That friend is probably just as weary, lonely and drifting as you are. Who is going to be brave first?
How can iron sharpen iron if it is left standing alone in a field?
Having a global community has had the downside effect of crippling us. We get too comfortable and satisfied with the empty depth of relationships and let it become the norm. Because although you can connect with anyone in the world, they can’t show up at your door with a meal, they can’t cry with you and carry the burden in your living room. And how can we invest in such a large span of associations?
Acts 2:46 Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts..
Clans
Kinfolk
Villages
Tribes
They meet together. They get messy around each other. They share life together. Do you have depth with people? I’m as guilty as the next at simply pushing through my agenda, my schedule so that I can get to ‘me time’. And when I can’t get there fast enough, or someone imposes on it, I get irritable or grumpy. But then Holy Spirit taps me on the shoulder. Often not saying a word, but just the tap makes me pause and realize that I am turning my world inside too much and isolating.
But the truth is that when I pause and take time to have conversations with the mailman or get to know the regular faces I see at the grocery store, we are gaining ground. Not just small talk. I know when our mailman is going on vacation, where he’s headed, when he sees his granddaughter and can be praying for his wife when she has surgery.
Through my church my husband and I have connected with a small group. Our routine was to meet together once a week and we would talk about the scripture passage and the sermon from Sunday. We would dig in and pray together. We would offer our vulnerable hearts to connect past daily niceties. And we created community. Even so, it takes effort. It requires sacrifice and risk to pursue outside of those fixed times and build those friendships.
The question becomes – are you willing to do the work?
God birthed the tribes of Israel. He set out for people to live and exist in community. But over time it seems like we haven’t been satisfied with that. We have wanted bigger and more and we thought we could reinvent community on a global scale. But the larger the scale, the less visible anyone is.
Acts 2:46 Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts..
Who are you meeting with this week? Who can you invite into your home? If you don’t want to stress about cooking, order a pizza.
Father God, we have stretched beyond our limits and our arms are weary and lonely. Our hearts are racing, our minds are misunderstanding and defending in a vicious cycle. Blow a might wind through us and clear out the clutter. Help us to focus. Help us to be brave. Help us to do the risky thing and reach out toward others and find our community. Grant us peace in a new way, and teach us how to have that peace here, right where we are, and not worry about getting ‘there.’ In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Well put!